The Evil of Dowry in Indian Society
‘Dowry’
may not be an alien word but the concept will certainly seem extra-terrestrial
to those who are not familiar with the evils associated with this 5 letter
word. My Indian society in particular is plagued by this phenomenon. Marriages
are made in heaven as we say; but in India they are made and broken courtesy of
‘dowry’ given to grooms. The British were ‘kind’ enough to abolish the concept
of ‘sati’ in the subcontinent but couldn’t root out the dowry system prevailing
within the society.
The
Indian Law of 1961 prohibits the practice of dowry and it is a punishable offense
but in reality it exists and is practiced with fervor throughout India.
Interestingly there is no prohibition on bestowing ‘gifts’ upon the bride or
groom. Technically speaking these gifts are owned by the bride and in the event
of an unfortunate divorce she is entitled to keep those gifts.
The
reality though is that the ‘bride’ has been never actually able to retain
possession of these items for they either depreciate to a negligible value or are sold by the ‘in-laws’ long before for
any ‘special’ need that may have arisen during the course of the marriage. And
trust me these needs often arise on a regular basis. Males in Indian society
are considered bread earners and their birth is celebrated where as deaths are
mourned.
On
the contrary ‘women’ are considered mere objects of pleasure or ‘fertility
clinics’ with the sole duty of giving birth and raising children. Therefore the
majority of parents especially in rural areas think that by marrying their son
to any woman; they are actually doing a favor to the ‘bride’s family.
A
list of demands presented before the ‘bride’s family before marriage often
includes a house or land, a suitable vehicle and gold ornaments. Some are
audacious enough to ask for outright cash so that their ‘son’ could open up a
business or some shop.
From
a legal point of view they are considered as gifts to the bride but in fact
they are provided so that the groom and his family may treat the girl with
respect and she can live peacefully. For neutral observers this practice
resembles to a ‘trade’ where security, comfort and a groom is being purchased at
a reasonable price.
To
add insult to injury; if the girl successfully fulfills all the demands still
then her behavior is often kept under close watch and the slightest mistake of
hers often puts her in deep trouble. Divorces are not taken lightly in Indian
society and a divorced woman is considered ‘spoiled goods’ with no future.
Therefore the bride’s family often goes out of their way to ensure that no
bitter issues may arise due to lack of ‘dowry’. The laws exist on paper but in
practice they are found nowhere.
It
is more of a social issue than legal; education and mindsets are two important
factors that need to be focused if the ‘dowry’ system is to be eradicated from our
Indian society. Nevertheless all is not so gloomy; India is changing and some
educated Indian families already recognize that ‘dowry’ is not only an
unnecessary burden on the ‘bride’ and her family but it weakens the bond
between husband and wife.
Oh wow! I don't know much about the Indian Society and dowry sounds horrid! I'm glad it's not legal and but it's not right that it's still happening! Thanks for teaching me something new today!
ReplyDelete--Autumn from My Kind Of Introduction
Thanks for stopping by!! :)
DeleteNot one place in this post did I see the word LOVE mentioned. What happens when a man falls in love and doesn't care about a dowry?
ReplyDeleteIt is almost like the women in your country are slaves.
Well love marriages are also common in India but you'll be surprised to know that Dowry is must whether it is love marriage or arranged. Dowry extortion or harassment happens due to their families. People used to think that these things are happening in lower and medium class families but the fact is that people from lower class background adopts upper class rituals. Most cases of dowry harassment are registered against upper class families. I guess many of them are rich but not civilized yet!!
DeleteSo how about you Akhil,
DeleteAre you married and did you get a Dowry? Just curious..
Lol no I am not married yet :P And thankfully my family doesn't support Dowry system.
DeleteWell good for you and your family!! Now you need to find the Love Of Your Life!
Deletei have a lot of indian friends when I was in china and I heard about this all the time. I have a filipina friend who married and indian guy and she never GAVE A single cents. but then again she is not indian.
ReplyDeleteIndian is changing and i Hope these rituals will vanish soon :)
DeleteThis is an interesting post. I love learning about different cultures.
ReplyDeleteOh, Akhil, how horrible for the poor woman in this situation! I am glad to see that India is changing and hope that these rituals do vanish soon. I'm also thankful that your family doesn't support this system. Thanks to you I have learned a lot about Indian culture and society these last few days. :)
ReplyDeleteIndian culture is very colorful...Actually i am just sharing some bad points..that's it. As i said, India is changing and developing so you'll see a new and better India very soon. Thanks for reading Pam :)
DeleteI am not familiar with the Indian culture at all. Very interesting read.
ReplyDeleteYeah I knew this and think it is a shame in this day and age that it still is practiced. That women are mere objects. I do hope things change, for the women of Indian in more ways than just this. Higher education, no more forced marriages and on and on. Thanks for sharing I am sure your opinion is not popular among traditional Indian men. Kudos to you for standing out.
ReplyDeleteDawn
Spatulas On Parade
Thanks Dawn, you can also share your blog link here :)
DeleteI know this the cultural norm in India but I personally find this to be disgusting. I don't like the fact that women are treated as a "pleasure palace" with no worth of their own. I can't imagine being a women in that culture.
ReplyDeleteIt's such a shame that it still happens, I can't quite get my head around it I have to admit. I'm so glad to read your family believe in love :) x
ReplyDeleteI am glad to hear that things are changing. Given that the tradition seems to be so deeply rooted in Indian families and culture, it's commendable that some families are bucking the system and rejecting it. Let's hope more people join them.
ReplyDeleteI hope more follow!
ReplyDeleteSo far I wasn't familiar with the Indian culture at all. Great to get a little inside look. Hope there is more like that coming!
ReplyDeleteThis is horrible. But at least the indian culture is coming out of the dark ages and becoming more civilized.
ReplyDeleteVery interesting article. I am glad that things are changing. I hope that it moves at a quick pace and women can be seen as equals.
ReplyDelete